How to Break Free from the Habit of Seeking Approval

Do you often rely on others' approval to feel confident or make decisions? Do you need a push from someone to reassure you that you're on the right path? If so, you're far from alone. Many people struggle with the constant need for external validation, and while it's a tough habit to break, it's entirely possible.

The urge to seek approval can be rooted in various factors, such as early childhood experiences, societal expectations, or deep-seated personal insecurities. This behaviour can manifest in different ways, whether constantly asking for validation, people-pleasing, or going out of your way to avoid any form of disapproval.

While seeking approval can have benefits, like improving relationships or advancing your career, it becomes a problem when it's your primary source of motivation. Relying too much on others' approval can disconnect you from your own values, goals, and sense of self. Over time, this can lead to burnout, stress, and difficulty saying "no" to things that don't serve you.

If you find yourself caught in this cycle, it's essential to take a moment to reflect and assess why you crave approval in the first place. Ask yourself: What do I truly value? What keeps me up at night? How do I really want to spend my time? You can live a more fulfilling and authentic life by tuning into your genuine desires and aligning your actions with your core values and goals.

Here are some steps to help you break free from the approval-seeking cycle:

1. Be honest with yourself: When taking on a new responsibility or commitment, ask yourself if you're doing it because it feels suitable for you or simply to win approval or avoid criticism.

2. Set boundaries: Learn to say no when a request doesn't align with your values or priorities. Although setting boundaries can initially feel uncomfortable, it's crucial to living a more genuine life.

3. Practice self-care: Make time for yourself and prioritize activities that bring joy and fulfilment. Caring for your own needs will help you reconnect with your inner self and strengthen your values.

4. Focus on intrinsic motivation: Rather than chasing external validation, focus on what intrinsically motivates you. Set meaningful personal goals that align with your values and pursue them for your own sense of satisfaction, not because you want approval from others.

5. Seek support: Breaking the approval-seeking habit is complex, and asking for help is okay. Lean on friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and encouragement.

In conclusion, while seeking approval is common, breaking free from it is essential to living a more authentic and fulfilling life. By reflecting on your values, setting boundaries, and focusing on intrinsic motivation, you can stop relying on others' validation and live in alignment with your true self.

Understanding the Options

How to Find the Right Talking Therapist or Counselor When Going Through a Mental Health Crisis

Going through a mental health crisis can be a complicated and overwhelming experience. It's essential to have the proper support and guidance to work through the crisis and regain a sense of stability. One of the most effective forms of support is talking therapy or counselling, but finding the right therapist or counsellor can be daunting. Here are some tips to help you find the right talking therapy or counsellor.

1. Determine Your Needs

The first step in finding the right talking therapy or counsellor is to determine what you need from the therapy or counselling. For example, are you dealing with a specific mental health condition such as depression or anxiety? Are you looking for support in managing stress or a difficult life transition? Knowing what you need from talking therapy or counselling will help you to find a therapist or counsellor who is well-suited to meet those needs.

1. Consider the Type of Therapy

Many types of talking therapy are available, each with its own approach and focus. Therefore, it's essential to research the different types of talking therapy and consider which one best fits you. Some popular types of talking therapy include cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), which focuses on changing negative thought patterns and talk therapy, which focuses on exploring feelings and emotions.

1. Look for a Qualified Therapist or Counselor

Finding a therapist or counsellor qualified to provide the talking therapy or counselling you need is essential. Look for a licensed therapist or counsellor with experience working with the specific issues you are struggling with. It's also a good idea to check if the therapist or counsellor is a member of a professional organization, as this can indicate their level of expertise.

1. Consider the Logistics

When searching for talking therapy or a counsellor, it's essential to consider the logistics of the therapy or counselling sessions. For example, can you attend in-person sessions, or will you need to find a therapist or counsellor who offers online or telephone sessions? Are you seeking a therapist or counsellor who is available during specific hours or days? Consider these factors when searching for talking therapy or a counsellor.

1. Trust Your Instincts

Ultimately, the most critical factor in finding the right talking therapy or counsellor is whether or not you feel comfortable with them. Trust your instincts and choose a therapist or counsellor you can trust and open up to. Remember that talking therapy or counselling is a personal journey; finding a therapist or counsellor you feel comfortable working with is essential.

Going through a mental health crisis can be a complicated and overwhelming experience. It's essential to have the proper support and guidance to work through the crisis and regain a sense of stability. Finding the right talking therapy or counsellor can be a daunting task. Still, by determining your needs, considering the type of talking therapy, looking for a qualified therapist or counsellor, considering the logistics, and trusting your instincts, you can find the right talking therapy or counsellor to help you through this difficult time.