Letting Go of Worries

  

How to Live Life Like a Child

Quotes:

• "Children are happy because they don't have a file in their minds called 'All The Things That Could Go Wrong.'" - Marianne Williamson
• "In every real man, a child who wants to play is hidden" - Friedrich Nietzsche.
• "To be a child is to be so fully yourself that the world is in harmony with your joy." - Unknown.
• "We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing." - George Bernard Shaw.

In this blog post, we explored the idea that children are often carefree and happy because they don't have a mental file of worries that hold them back. We also provided tips on breaking free from this mental file and living more authentically.

Remember, embracing uncertainty, practising mindfulness, challenging our beliefs, taking small steps, and playing can all help us let go of worries and live more fully in the present moment. So, let's take inspiration from children and learn to embrace the joy of living without worrying about the future.

As we grow older, we accumulate experiences, knowledge, and responsibilities that shape how we see the world. As a result, we develop beliefs, assumptions, and expectations about how things should be, which can often lead to anxiety, stress, and worry. We become more risk-averse and less willing to take chances, and our thoughts become consumed with our actions' potential adverse outcomes.

However, children often are free of these worries. They live in the moment, playing, learning, and exploring with curiosity and wonder. They don't have a file called "All The Things That Could Go Wrong." But as we grow older, we tend to create this mental file, which can hold us back from truly living our lives.

Here are some tips on how to break free from this mental file and start living life more authentically:

1. Embrace uncertainty: One of the reasons children seem to be more carefree is that they haven't yet learned to fear uncertainty. As adults, we often avoid trying new things or taking risks because we fear the unknown. However, embracing uncertainty can be liberating. It can help us break out of our comfort zones and discover new things about ourselves. So next time you're faced with a choice between the known and the unknown, choose the unknown and see what happens.
2. Practice mindfulness: Mindfulness is being fully present and engaged at the moment. It can help you let go of your worries and focus on what's happening now. Try spending a few minutes each day practising mindfulness. You can do this by sitting quietly, paying attention to your breath, or doing a guided meditation. Mindfulness can help you become more aware of your thoughts and emotions and help you break free from the mental file of worries.
3. Challenge your beliefs: Often, our worries are based on beliefs and assumptions that may not be true. For example, you may worry that you must be better, thoughtful, and attractive enough. However, these beliefs are often unfounded and can hold you back from living a fulfilling life. Please take a closer look at your beliefs and challenge them. Ask yourself if they're true, and look for evidence that supports or contradicts them. You may be surprised at how much your worries are based on false beliefs.
4. Take small steps: If you're feeling overwhelmed or stuck, try breaking down your goals into smaller, more manageable steps. Taking small actions can help you build momentum and boost your confidence. For example, if you want to start a new hobby but need help knowing where to begin, start by researching online or buying a beginner's kit. Again, taking small steps can help you get out of your head and into action.
5. Play: As we age, we often need to remember how to play. However, play is vital for reducing stress and increasing happiness. Try doing something just for fun, whether playing a game, doing a puzzle, or goofing around with friends. Playing can help you overcome worries and connect with your inner child.

In conclusion, children are happy because they don't have a mental file of worries that hold them back. However, as adults, we can learn to break free from this mental file and start living life more authentically. Embracing uncertainty, practising mindfulness, challenging our beliefs, taking small steps, and playing can all help us let go of worries and live more fully in the present moment.

How to Break Free from the Habit of Seeking Approval

Do you often rely on others' approval to feel confident or make decisions? Do you need a push from someone to reassure you that you're on the right path? If so, you're far from alone. Many people struggle with the constant need for external validation, and while it's a tough habit to break, it's entirely possible.

The urge to seek approval can be rooted in various factors, such as early childhood experiences, societal expectations, or deep-seated personal insecurities. This behaviour can manifest in different ways, whether constantly asking for validation, people-pleasing, or going out of your way to avoid any form of disapproval.

While seeking approval can have benefits, like improving relationships or advancing your career, it becomes a problem when it's your primary source of motivation. Relying too much on others' approval can disconnect you from your own values, goals, and sense of self. Over time, this can lead to burnout, stress, and difficulty saying "no" to things that don't serve you.

If you find yourself caught in this cycle, it's essential to take a moment to reflect and assess why you crave approval in the first place. Ask yourself: What do I truly value? What keeps me up at night? How do I really want to spend my time? You can live a more fulfilling and authentic life by tuning into your genuine desires and aligning your actions with your core values and goals.

Here are some steps to help you break free from the approval-seeking cycle:

1. Be honest with yourself: When taking on a new responsibility or commitment, ask yourself if you're doing it because it feels suitable for you or simply to win approval or avoid criticism.

2. Set boundaries: Learn to say no when a request doesn't align with your values or priorities. Although setting boundaries can initially feel uncomfortable, it's crucial to living a more genuine life.

3. Practice self-care: Make time for yourself and prioritize activities that bring joy and fulfilment. Caring for your own needs will help you reconnect with your inner self and strengthen your values.

4. Focus on intrinsic motivation: Rather than chasing external validation, focus on what intrinsically motivates you. Set meaningful personal goals that align with your values and pursue them for your own sense of satisfaction, not because you want approval from others.

5. Seek support: Breaking the approval-seeking habit is complex, and asking for help is okay. Lean on friends, family, or a therapist for guidance and encouragement.

In conclusion, while seeking approval is common, breaking free from it is essential to living a more authentic and fulfilling life. By reflecting on your values, setting boundaries, and focusing on intrinsic motivation, you can stop relying on others' validation and live in alignment with your true self.

Understanding the Options

How to Find the Right Talking Therapist or Counselor When Going Through a Mental Health Crisis

Going through a mental health crisis can be a complicated and overwhelming experience. It's essential to have the proper support and guidance to work through the crisis and regain a sense of stability. One of the most effective forms of support is talking therapy or counselling, but finding the right therapist or counsellor can be daunting. Here are some tips to help you find the right talking therapy or counsellor.

1. Determine Your Needs

The first step in finding the right talking therapy or counsellor is to determine what you need from the therapy or counselling. For example, are you dealing with a specific mental health condition such as depression or anxiety? Are you looking for support in managing stress or a difficult life transition? Knowing what you need from talking therapy or counselling will help you to find a therapist or counsellor who is well-suited to meet those needs.

1. Consider the Type of Therapy

Many types of talking therapy are available, each with its own approach and focus. Therefore, it's essential to research the different types of talking therapy and consider which one best fits you. Some popular types of talking therapy include cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), which focuses on changing negative thought patterns and talk therapy, which focuses on exploring feelings and emotions.

1. Look for a Qualified Therapist or Counselor

Finding a therapist or counsellor qualified to provide the talking therapy or counselling you need is essential. Look for a licensed therapist or counsellor with experience working with the specific issues you are struggling with. It's also a good idea to check if the therapist or counsellor is a member of a professional organization, as this can indicate their level of expertise.

1. Consider the Logistics

When searching for talking therapy or a counsellor, it's essential to consider the logistics of the therapy or counselling sessions. For example, can you attend in-person sessions, or will you need to find a therapist or counsellor who offers online or telephone sessions? Are you seeking a therapist or counsellor who is available during specific hours or days? Consider these factors when searching for talking therapy or a counsellor.

1. Trust Your Instincts

Ultimately, the most critical factor in finding the right talking therapy or counsellor is whether or not you feel comfortable with them. Trust your instincts and choose a therapist or counsellor you can trust and open up to. Remember that talking therapy or counselling is a personal journey; finding a therapist or counsellor you feel comfortable working with is essential.

Going through a mental health crisis can be a complicated and overwhelming experience. It's essential to have the proper support and guidance to work through the crisis and regain a sense of stability. Finding the right talking therapy or counsellor can be a daunting task. Still, by determining your needs, considering the type of talking therapy, looking for a qualified therapist or counsellor, considering the logistics, and trusting your instincts, you can find the right talking therapy or counsellor to help you through this difficult time.

A Storm Within

Sadness and anxiety, a storm within,

A tempest of emotions that never seems to end.

Tears that fall, fear that grips,

A heart that aches, a mind that flips.

Sadness that's fueled by past regrets,

Anxiety that's born from future threats.

It's a cycle that spins out of control,

A dance of darkness that clouds the soul.

The sadness whispers, the anxiety screams,

A constant chatter that never let us go.

It's a weight that drags, a burden to bear,

A constant reminder of things that aren't fair.

But in the midst of this turmoil and pain,

There's a chance for growth, to break the chain.

To understand the root of the sadness and anxiety,

And to find a way to heal and recover, eventually.

So let the sadness and anxiety be felt,

But let them not consume. Let them not melt.

For in this struggle, there's a chance to grow,

And to find peace in letting go.

It's a process, a journey of self-discovery,

To understand emotions and learn to recover.

With time and patience, one can find a way,

To let go of sadness and anxiety and find a brighter day.

Reconnecting with Your True Self

  Have you ever felt like you're just going through the motions, trapped in a cycle of routine and monotony? Perhaps you've convinced yourself that this is okay, yet confusion lingers. You might even find it hard to remember the last time you felt alive.

This feeling of disconnection is not uncommon, especially for those of us who grew up in environments where self-expression was stifled. Take the story of M, for example. Growing up in a large family, M learned to suppress his emotions. With so many voices vying for attention, he felt there wasn't enough space to express himself. Over time, this suppression turned into a habit, leading him to shut down emotionally and remain silent. As a result, his life became a series of automatic responses devoid of genuine passion or purpose.

However, as M took the time to reflect on his life, he came to a startling realization: something vital was missing. He couldn't quite identify when or how he had learned to numb his feelings, but he recognized that this habit prevented him from truly connecting with himself and forming deep relationships with others. This realization prompted M to ask himself some critical questions:

• What do I love unconditionally?
• What is my number-one accomplishment in life?
• What do I enjoy doing when no one is watching?
• What would my life look like if there was no such thing as fear and failure?

These questions are not just for M; they can resonate with anyone who feels disconnected from their true self. If you can relate to M's experience, you must recognize that you are not alone. Many individuals struggle with suppressing their emotions due to their upbringing or other life experiences. The good news is that it is entirely possible to reconnect with your feelings and live a more fulfilling life.

Steps to Reconnect with Your True Self

1. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness is a powerful tool for self-discovery and emotional awareness. Take time each day to reflect on your thoughts and feelings in the present moment without judgment. This practice can help you become more attuned to your emotions and understand how they influence your behaviour and decisions. Consider incorporating mindfulness meditation, breathing exercises, or simple moments of quiet reflection into your routine.

2. Journaling: Writing can be a vital outlet for your thoughts and feelings. Set aside a few minutes daily to jot down your emotions, experiences, and reflections. Journaling helps you process your emotions and provides clarity on your thoughts and goals. Consider exploring specific prompts, such as reflecting on what brings you joy or what dreams you've set aside.

3. Seek Support: There's no need to navigate this journey alone. Talking to a trusted friend or family member can offer a different perspective and comfort. If you find it challenging to process your emotions independently, consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counsellor. They can offer guidance and tools to help you work through feelings and reconnect with your true self.

4. Engage in Activities that Bring You Joy: Reconnecting with your true self often involves rediscovering what makes you happy. Make time for hobbies, sports, or activities that bring you joy. Whether painting, hiking, dancing, or cooking, find activities that allow you to express yourself freely. Surround yourself with people who uplift you and support your passions.

5. Explore Your Values: Reflect on your core values and what matters most. Understanding your values can serve as a guiding compass in your life, helping you make decisions that align with your true self. Consider creating a vision board or writing a list of your values to visualize what you aspire to be and do.

6. Practice Self-Compassion: As you embark on this journey of self-discovery, remember to be kind to yourself. Emotions can be messy, and feeling vulnerable as you navigate your feelings is okay. Embrace self-compassion and recognize that healing takes time. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and remind yourself that it's okay to ask for help.

 Remember, there is always time to reconnect with your emotions and live a more fulfilling life. By reflecting on your feelings and seeking support, you can learn to live more authentically and find greater meaning. This journey is not a race; it is a personal exploration. Embrace the process, and take it one step at a time. Your true self is waiting to be discovered, and the more you nurture this connection, the more vibrant and meaningful your life will become.